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Twelve Truths to Motherhood


1. Coffee is no longer a want, but a necessity. How are you going to seize the day with kids on less than 6 hours of sleep?!


2. Say good-bye to privacy for 18-25 years. My five year old still follows me to the bathroom. And the three year old interupts my showers to tell me she has to poop. Oh and the infant just *knows* when I sit down for the first time that day, even if it’s after he’s gone to bed.


3. Remember how Mama Bear’s porridge was too cold? Yeah… My dinner is usually cold too. I’m nice and put everyone else’s food on their plates first. Sit down with mine, salt and pepper it, salt and pepper the children’s, get up to get them something to drink, get up to get them an extra napkin, help cut up their food, feed the baby, take a bite. And it’s cold. Always. Never fails.


4. Speaking of dinner…. Dinner is a struggle. Not only will you eat it cold, but getting it on the table can cause turmoil. I’ve even tried meal planning, but we always end up eating dinner super late because stuff pops up either before I start cooking or while I’m cooking. I really don’t understand why making dinner is expected of me every night. Seriously- I kept these little people alive all day and they want to eat again?! Ugh.


5. Laundry piled up. It could be clean, it could be dirty. Everyone has laundry issues. Heck, it could be folded but never see a hanger or dresser drawer. Laundry is a constant struggle. Why do people want to wear clothes in this house?!


6. Shopping won’t ever be the same. I used to love buying pretty shoes, handbags, and $50 jeans. Now, I barely purchase things for myself unless they’re on sale. But hey, I have no issues buying that $30 outfit for the kids and they’ll grow out of it next month.


7. Your hobbies are going to change. More than likely, if you’re visiting my blog…. You may have a collection of cloth diapers. Did you think before motherhood that you would have a collection of poop catchers?! I know I didn’t! Or baby carriers? Nope. Hobbies change during motherhood.


8. You want a mini van. Okay, maybe you don’t want a mini van… Maybe it’s an SUV that you want because kids seriously take up SO much room. Finding the perfect SUV will probably be quite difficult, but don’t just look around your local area. With the help of companies like Cars Relo, you can look for your perfect SUV all around America. Cars Relo could pick up your new SUV and deliver it to your home, meaning that you wouldn’t have to travel all the way across the country. You’ll probably need to factor in how many children will be in the SUV at one time, this should help to ensure that you find the perfect sized vehicle.

9. For a couple of years, your body is no longer your own. Or your husband’s. Let’s be honest here. Pregnancy kind of sucks when you’re nauseous, aching, and moody. But then a baby comes out. And then if you’re a breastfeeding mama, your boobs are theirs. For however long you breastfeed. And then, you’re pregnant again. And the cycle just goes on and on.


10. Want a snack? Don’t want to share it? I can’t count how many times I’ve hidden in the bathroom with the door locked (because remember, the five year old still follows me there) to eat half an apple pie, a chocolate bar, a cookie, a brownie, or even one of their fruit snacks. And I’m highly against eating in the bathroom. But hey- if you want that snack badly enough… You’ll eat it in the bathroom.


11. After the kids go to bed, you may sit on the couch after a long day and find yourself watching Doc McStuffins- because you have to make sure that toy feels better! The episode may be over before you even realize that you’re watching it while the kids are in bed.


12. Wine. Wine may be your best friend after a long day. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have wine in my fridge at all times. Do I drink it every night? Nope. But after a particularly trying day…. I just want wine and an adult show. Scandal? Jane the Virgin? Grey’s Anatomy? Ohhh yeah. And crap, the baby woke up again. Maybe I’ll get to finish my glass of wine and sit down with my show in an hour. Or tomorrow.

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