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Untangling The World of Motherhood

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When you think that you may be pregnant, the feeling in the pit of your stomach is excitement mixed with abject terror at what you’re about to embark on. You’ve peed on a stick this morning. Two lines have popped up and your life has just changed in that split second. You have a secret – a little life, a scrap of life in a vast empty space, soon to be filled. There’s a whole world you have just been given a key to and that world is motherhood.

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Like most mums, you’re probably already joining forums and baby websites like innerparents.com to find the best deals on baby goodies, the best reviews for equipment and in forums, learning what to expect. I can tell you a little secret: nothing you read online is going to prepare you for what is about to happen to your world. Exciting and terrifying, motherhood is full of judgement. You’ve probably been part of that without even realising. When you’ve seen those babies throwing tantrums in supermarkets, or a mother bottle feeding her baby, or someone adding disposable nappies to the already growing landfill, the thought ‘that won’t be me’ will likely have crossed your mind.

Honestly, there’s a good chance it will be. Except that you don’t know that until you become a mummy. Every piece of advice you soak up from forums and books may guide you but it won’t be fool proof. Babies don’t come out with a manual attached, I’m afraid! Before we become parents, we’re the best parents out there! There will be a day your two-year-old will throw a fit in a supermarket and someone will turn a nose up at you. There may well be a day you have to use bottles instead of breastfeed; that’s the other secret, no one tells you how hard it can be to feed your baby yourself. You may also go into motherhood with all the best intentions of cloth nappies with cute designs but there will also be times that a disposable is just easier. But do you want to know the biggest secret of all? Everything you do as a mother, is right.

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You are the master of your own life, you know that, and when you become a mother everything you ever knew will be thrown into question. You’ll not only question your own choices for your child, you’ll have everyone else question you as well. You gain a lion’s roar when you birth a child because not only do you have to speak for yourself, you have to advocate for them. This tiny life, not much bigger than eight pounds, now rules things for you. They are demanding, loud and dependent and you are their voice until they can speak for themselves. That’s your job now.

So, when people turn up their nose at your choices, and when you have a seconds doubt on whether what you are doing is best, know that it already is. Untangling the world of motherhood is not easy and you – like every mother out there – will have your hurdles. But chin up, because this is your badge of honour and you have to wear it like the queen you are!

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